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Breaking the ice

by Kiran on September 19, 2011 · 33 comments

in Asides, Social Media

Good morning!! I hope you are having a great start on a Monday.

I wanted to confess about a topic that have been etching for a debate quite a while now. You see, I do blog. Heck, not only I am a blogger, but I create recipes and photograph as well.

I might be perceived as an out-goer with a great personality. Well, who am I to reject those qualities? But I want to come clean. I have a shy personality.

Garnered I’ve attended a handful of social events. Admittedly I still have problem in breaking the ice. It’s a term used as making an introduction to a complete stranger and getting to know more people by making a fool out of myself. Well, that’s my definition. I have trouble communicating my thoughts and I blame it on various reasons:

I am way too shy!

I get way too excited and often say the wrong things at the most absurd time.

My English is wonky. Is wonky a word?

My accent is lousy for American’s to understand – I’ve been asked numerous times to repeat whatever I was saying.

I sweat, shake, shiver and often loose focus.

I often ask myself, “am I unapproachable?”

As a full time homemaker and blogger, there isn’t much daily face-to-face interactions and networking opportunities (without breaking the $$$) with peers, readers etc. I need to get a hang of things before it’s too late. If you are a great social butterfly:

Do you have tricks up your sleeve for being more sociable without breaking a sweat?

p/s: Though a self-proclaimed Chatterbox, I limit making a fool out of myself only in front of families and friends. Better luck next time?

Image source

{ 31 comments }

1 Destination Infinity September 19, 2011 at 1:42 PM

I am pretty much in the same boat… I don’t prefer to approach people if there isn’t any reason to do so. Sometimes it turns out to be good πŸ™‚

Destination Infinity
Destination Infinity recently posted..Why do they blare music with the loudest speakers at marriage receptions?

2 dinu September 19, 2011 at 4:16 PM

I sometimes feel I speak too much .. there are so many situations where I finish a conversation and tell myself that I shouldn’t have said this or that..

3 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 2:52 PM

Dinu,
It’s been a long time buddy πŸ™‚

4 Aakash Kokz September 19, 2011 at 11:01 PM

A very good morning to you as well ..
Your English ain’t wonky at all πŸ™‚
I guess you are quite friendly and approachable ..
Take care, keep posting πŸ™‚
Aakash Kokz recently posted..Who was at fault !!!

5 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 2:53 PM

Aakash,
Thank you so much! You are way too kind πŸ™‚

6 sujatha sathya September 20, 2011 at 12:19 AM

i could so relate to this post πŸ™‚ . it happens with me too πŸ™
waiting for those tips you asked from social butterflies πŸ™‚
sujatha sathya recently posted..The 10 Things that Make Me Feel Good

7 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 2:57 PM

Sujatha,
The others shared some great tips on breaking the ice, in this comment section. Hopefully it helps us both!

8 Abu September 20, 2011 at 12:43 AM

“I get way too excited and often say the wrong things at the most absurd time.”

Even I find myself in such situations sometimes. Best way to avoid such thing is using ‘pauses’ – not like Atalji’s πŸ˜‰ but take a mintue or two before opening your mouth πŸ™‚ works fine at this end and this gives an ‘impression’ that you are the ‘thinking-types’…

Will come back to see what others do to avoid these ‘well-known’ & ‘experienced’ traps πŸ˜€

Warm regards,
Abu recently posted..Love All…

9 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 2:58 PM

Abu,
Welcome to Chatterbox and thanks for taking the time to comment and providing some useful tips πŸ™‚

10 Kimberly September 20, 2011 at 9:57 AM

Truthfully…I’m very shy too. Seriously. I’m super quiet. When i told my friends that I blog, they just about fell out of their chairs. The couldn’t believe the shy quiet girl would do something like that.
I think though, that blogging is helping me break out of my shell.
Ps. Wonky is an awesome word.
Kimberly recently posted..He’s Got Dumps Like A Truck, Truck, Truck…

11 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 3:13 PM

Kimberly,
I promise you, the word “wonky” has nothing to do with “willie wonka & the chocolate factory” πŸ˜‰

12 Rosa September 20, 2011 at 2:26 PM

Exercise, exercise, exercise, etc….. I am also shy like you (I stress a lot, sweat, tremble and speak nonesense), but I have learn that the only way to get out of it is by meeting people. In one word, fight fire with fire…and take Rescure Remedy! ;-P

Cheers,

Rosa

13 jayendra sharan September 20, 2011 at 3:58 PM

aaahhh..confession..very hard to make..if you have the courage to confess then I am sure you have the guts to overcame. Try to look in to yourself..deeply
Have a nice day πŸ™‚
jayendra sharan recently posted..struggling

14 sm September 20, 2011 at 7:10 PM

excellent question and i feel you got the power to accept and if u got such power you are capable to reach to any goal which ever you wish.
sm recently posted..26 Election Reforms Required for India to make India corruption free India

15 Kristen - Anywhere There's An Airport September 20, 2011 at 9:26 PM

I am all out there. Fool or not. I think this might be a “practice makes perfect” well, let’s say “practice makes better” scenario. I used to care far more what people thought or how I came across in a social setting. But the more I practice making a fool of myself the easier it becomes πŸ™‚
Kristen – Anywhere There’s An Airport recently posted..An American Saturday in September

16 Rasheed Ahmed September 21, 2011 at 1:22 AM

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17 sophia September 21, 2011 at 1:33 AM

I used to be really shy. I still am to a certain degree, but I find it easier to talk to people now. For me, I usually let the person talk about herself/himself. It gives me a chance to gauge what kind of person she/he is, and what her/his interests is, and then we find a topic of common interest. There is no need to forcefully make friends with someone with whom you don’t have anything in common though. If you don’t click, just move on to the next person! πŸ™‚
sophia recently posted..Soju Shot, β€œKkkkk!”

18 Rohit Sareen September 21, 2011 at 2:25 AM

hehehe…i was hoping you would have pointers on how to break the ice πŸ˜‰
Rohit Sareen recently posted..We are Family!

19 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 10:14 PM

Rohit,
Haha! I am not good or experienced in everything. But others gave very good pointers and you should check out the comment section πŸ™‚

20 Ameena September 21, 2011 at 10:27 AM

I consider myself a recluse but when I’m finally around people I don’t have any trouble making conversation. I think one of my strong points is being able to find common ground with just about everyone. I had to learn this at a young age because I had to converse with my dad’s clients regularly, and now I have to do it with my husband’s colleagues, etc. The more you put yourself out there the easier it is!

As for your accent, I bet nobody notices it but you. I promise you!
Ameena recently posted..tea time

21 Gayatri September 21, 2011 at 6:49 PM

I used to think I had no problems interacting with groups I’d only just met, until my husband told me I’m constantly cracking inappropriate jokes; the type one usually cracks with one’s friends … So now I’m more reserved and generally stick to small talk. I find asking questions works best. People loooovvvveeee to talk about themselves!!!

Gayatri
Gayatri recently posted..It’s TV Time!

22 Reem | Simply Reem September 21, 2011 at 8:47 PM

Honestly my dear I was a way too much of a shy person and the worse part I was working in fashion industry. Can you believe me….
But eventually I realize that if I be me and say what I”ll say to people I feel comfortable with I”ll be fine.
And it worked, just take it easy and always remember we all are humans with both plus and minus, so chill. People think about you what you think about yourself.
You are great Kiran and I must say a strong girl to talk about this on your blog. I totally am impressed dear.

23 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 10:18 PM

Reem,
Thanks a lot dear. I believe in keeping it real on the blog πŸ™‚

24 sm September 23, 2011 at 7:58 AM

good topic
sometimes i feel i talk lot and sometimes.
now have to think more on that
sm recently posted..Pune COEP Invites Sex workers to take part in Dandiya Nights Navratri festival

25 Kankana September 23, 2011 at 4:18 PM

In my house, the husband is the shy one and I can talk to any stranger.. i am not shy! These days I stay at home and hardly get to interact with any body on a daily basis. I think the best way to get out of it is to face the mirror and talk to yourself . A tick I read about in some article πŸ™‚
Kankana recently posted..Chocolate Chips Macadamia Nuts Cookies

26 @cpm5280 September 23, 2011 at 5:36 PM

Kiran, I think you’re quite open and friendly! We didn’t have any trouble meeting each other, although we had good stuff to talk about! You ask, above, “am I unapproachable?” I don’t think you are, but I’m very sure that I am!

27 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 10:21 PM

Chris,
So nice to hear from you my friend. And thank you for the compliments, you are way too kind πŸ™‚ I don’t think you are unapproachable yourself. I think we judge ourselves way too much than required!

28 Heavenly Housewife September 25, 2011 at 7:52 AM

Its hard to break out of old habits, but my tip is to smile. It makes you approachable, and then remind yourself that you are an interesting person with lots of great stuff to say πŸ˜€
*kisses* HH
Heavenly Housewife recently posted..Croissant Challenge: Just dough it!

29 Kiran September 26, 2011 at 10:22 PM

Heavenly Housewife,
Welcome to Chatterbox and thanks for the great words of encouragement. Surely made my day πŸ˜€

30 Tanvi September 29, 2011 at 8:16 PM

πŸ™‚ You are adorable Kiran! I agree with Ameena, the more you put yourself out there the better it gets … truly!

Also, what’s the big deal with accents. Everyone has one … Don’t think too much about it πŸ™‚

β™‘ from Β© tanvii.com
Tanvi recently posted..25 ways to wear a scarf!

31 Reema March 5, 2012 at 9:56 AM

even the first time when I stepped into a class to teach, I was so confident! And I carry that tough nut to crack exterior always but inside I am also shy πŸ™‚ So many bloggers and tweeps live here in Bangalore but I and a blogger meet/tweet up??? No way!!
Reema recently posted..Bangalore Chronicle

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